


can't you see i love you?

by Misterdevere



Series: what’s life without love [20]
Category: Kingsman (Movies)
Genre: Declarations Of Love, First argument, M/M, Misunderstandings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-07
Updated: 2020-09-07
Packaged: 2021-03-07 06:22:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,173
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26348536
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Misterdevere/pseuds/Misterdevere
Summary: Eggsy and Merlin hit a bit of a hurdle but have a hell of a breakthrough
Relationships: Merlin/Gary "Eggsy" Unwin
Series: what’s life without love [20]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1868476
Comments: 4
Kudos: 17





	can't you see i love you?

Eggsy planted himself in Merlin’s lap and pressed a kiss to his lips. “Listen, about our weekend away...I know I said Leo could stay at a friend’s but that kind of fell through.” He looped his arms around Merlin’s neck and kissed him again then pulled back tentatively. “Is there any chance he could come with us?”

“Well...couldn’t someone else have him for the weekend?”

“It’s kind of short notice. Bit rude to just invite him to someone’s house on short notice. Plus it would be kinda nice for us all to have a trip away, and we could go by ourselves another time.”

“Eggsy, I have the whole weekend planned, and I didn’t really account for Leo in those plans. I just thought - hoped, maybe - that we might be able to spend some time without him for once.”

“Can’t we change plans? Why you being like this?”

“What do you mean why am I being like this?” Merlin laughed incredulously. “I’ve had this planned for ages - I spent time and effort on it - and you’re asking me to scrap all of that so that you don’t have to have an awkward conversation with some other parents.”

Eggsy climbed off of him and stood with arms folded instead. “And you want me to abandon my son for a dirty weekend?”

“A romantic weekend.”

“Whatever. We ain’t even been together a year and you think you’ve got the right to ask me to put you before him? I’m not gonna palm him off on someone else to go on a fucking holiday with you and let him think that you’re more important because let me tell you right now, you will never be. He’s my whole life, if you can’t handle having him around then you can cancel all your precious fucking plans and get the fuck out of my house and both our lives.”

“Is that really what you think? Do you not think I’ve made every effort to get to know Leo, to get on with him? I like having him around us and I like being around you as a family. I know that he will always be more important than me and that he will always come first, your devotion to him is one of the things that I like so much about you. So I don’t mind if we never have a weekend to ourselves again, I just wanted this one for us. Just one. But don’t worry, I will cancel it, and I will get the fuck out.” Merlin stood too and started picking up his things to leave.

“Why? Why do you care so much about this one weekend?”

“I don’t think it matters any more.”

“Tell me.” Merlin just shook his head and went to leave. Eggsy grabbed his hand. “Tell me.”

“Forget it, okay?”

“No. You’re happy to call it off now but a second ago, it was the most important thing in the world. I wanna know why.”

Merlin huffed a sad laugh. “I’m not happy to call it off. But I was going to tell you I love you, I wanted it to be perfect, and there’s no point in doing all of that with someone who clearly doesn’t feel the same, is there?”

Eggsy’s hand and his jaw dropped in shock and Merlin headed for the front door. “Merlin! You can’t just leave.”

“Make your mind up, Eggsy. One minute you want me out of your lives, the next you won’t let me out the door. Which is it?”

Eggsy stepped closer to him and cupped his face in both hands. He immediately regretted the pain in Merlin’s eyes. “Please don’t go. I want you to stay.”  
_Here, now. With me, forever._

Merlin saw the panic in Eggsy’s eyes and felt himself calm a little, wanting to sooth him. “Are you sure?”

“Yeah. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said what I said.”

Merlin nodded with a small smile. “I’m sorry too, I worded things badly and I should’ve been more sensitive. I’ve just been looking forward to this so much.”

“Do you really love me?”

“I do. I’m sure now that I’ll regret this but I’m completely in love with you and I love Leo and I love being part of your lives. Like I said, I know that he will always be the most important person in your life and he should be, I would never want anything different. If it sounded like I don’t want him around, that’s not at all what I meant.”

“I know. I know it’s not, and I know how hard you’ve always tried with him and that means so much to me. It just wouldn’t be the first time that someone’s tried to cut him out and I’ll never let that happen. I’m sorry I flew off the handle, I just got scared that it was like a turning point, that this is where you start trying to get rid of him, and I don’t wanna get further along with you and then lose you. It felt safer to send you packing now if that’s what’s gonna happen in the end but that was fucking stupid. I don’t ever wanna lose you, I love you too.”

“You do?” Eggsy nodded and Merlin pulled him in for a gentle kiss. “Good.”

“I’m so sorry I ruined the surprise. I’ll sort something out with Leo, we can still go, I don’t wanna ruin the whole weekend.”

“No, no, it’s fine. You were right, we can go another time.”

“Merlin.” Eggsy scratched at the back of Merlin’s neck.

“Really, it’s okay.”

“Are you sure?” Merlin nodded and kissed him again. “I’m sorry.”

“Stop.” Eggsy pushed up onto his toes to kiss Merlin more firmly. “Shall we go back and talk properly?” Eggsy led him by the hand back to the sofa and climbed into his lap again. “Look, I’ve never been with someone who has kids before. I’ve never known two people in my life who have a bond like you and Leo and I would never, ever try to do anything to damage that. I’ll make mistakes but I need to be able to make those mistakes. I need to be able to tell you how I feel and what I want and you need to be able to disagree, and vice versa, but it’s no good for any of us to threaten to call things off as soon as that happens.”

“I know. That was really shitty of me, I’m so sorry.” Eggsy kissed him over and over. “No one will ever be more important than him but you come really close. Closer than anyone else ever has.”

“I’m honoured. You know you mean the world to me and I hope you know how much Leo means too. I don’t ever need to be first, I just want us to be solid.”

“Me too.” Merlin kissed him and a grin spread across Eggsy’s face. “I love you.”

Merlin’s grin matched his. “I love you.”


End file.
